Let Down Your Hare

Once upon a time, there was a girl named Rafunzel. Rafunzel had been trapped in a tower by an evil queen. Rafunzel had been in the tower for such a long time that she had never had a haircut. Her hair was so long that it dragged across the floor of the tower. It was extremely dirty and greasy. I know; I know. That’s so gross, right?

Poor Rafunzel had very few friends. Well, really, she had no friends because there was no one else locked in the tower with her. However, Rafunzel seemed to attract the attention of the forest animals where her tower was hidden. In fact, she seemed to attract a lot of attention from the animals. It probably had something to do with the wonderful aroma that rose from her hair.

In between visits from the wicked queen, and when she was very bored, Rafunzel would hang her long hair out the window of the tower, and all the hares from the woods would climb up her long hair as though it were a rope ladder. They would come into the tower where Rafunzel lived, and they would keep the poor, lonely girl company.

One day, a handsome prince rode his mighty steed into the depths of the forest and found the tower. He spied Rafunzel from the window. He wanted to save the beautiful girl even if she did have greasy, dirty hair. Realizing he could use those tresses as a ladder, he asked the girl for her name and then hollered in his best hero voice, “Rafunzel, Rafunzel, let down your hair!”

Now Rafunzel, having lived alone, wasn’t the brightest of girls. She thought he meant all of her rabbit friends, and so she began throwing down the hares one by one. The poor rabbits bounced off the head of the unsuspecting prince, who was eventually knocked unconscious by the unexpected surprise. The queen found the poor prince and was forced to move Rafunzel out of the tower and into a condominium at the beach.